“I DON'T CARE!" Harry yelled at them, snatching up a lunascope and throwing it into the fireplace. "I'VE HAD ENOUGH, I'VE SEEN ENOUGH, I WANT OUT, I WANT IT TO END, I DON'T CARE ANYMORE!" "You do care," said Dumbledore. He had not flinched or made a single move to stop Harry demolishing his office. His expression was calm, almost detached. "You care so much you feel as though you will bleed to death with the pain of it.” ― J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix

"You care so much you feel as though you will bleed to death with the pain of it.” 

So I have yet another injury. It is probably minor and gone within a few days, but it is so frustrating! I ran around the neighborhood yesterday morning. I had a great time, so much so I wasn't sure if I went around the .6 mile loop  3 or 4 times. The last time around I felt some pain in my arch and didn't think much of it. I went out grocery shopping and running errands, did some cleaning, and started some laundry (my life is so amazingly interesting, right?). Then as I was making dinner it felt like the arch of my foot wanted to crack and was sore. After dinner, my entire foot (top, bottom, ankle, part of my calf) had a throbbing, radiating pain shooting through it. I iced it and still the pain persisted. It was only after an Aleve that the pain was a little less intense and I slept with my foot propped up. 

I'm too young for this. 

I cannot describe in words how defeated I felt last night. It's always something. Yes, I'm on the hunt for a doctor so I can get answers to why this one leg is the bain of my exercise existence. Even when I was 30 pounds lighter I still had foot pain, but of course the extra weight makes everything worse. Ah if only I could lose 30 pounds in one night...

Um, maybe not...

I love quotes. I love books. When I ran across this Harry Potter quote it was perfect. I just want to give up right now. I want to just say, "SCREW IT ALL!! IT ISN'T WORTH IT! I DON'T CARE!" But the truth is I care so much. If I didn't care about getting healthy and becoming a distance runner I wouldn't get so emotional and angry. I would shrug my shoulders and say, well at least I tried! And that race is nipping at my painful heels. 

Nothing in life worth having comes easy, right?

So today I'm hobbling about the house doing little things here and there. I'm giving it one really good day of rest and then maybe I'll try doing a light walk on it tomorrow. I'm hoping there is that stretchy bandage stuff around here somewhere to wrap my arch and ankle for some extra support. 

I'm thinking I'll sign up for that community chorus today. I've been back and forth with participating or not. My husband knocked some sense and tough love into me a few nights ag0 (figuratively not literally!).
After getting married so fast, failing at 4 different jobs in the span of 2 years, and having lots of anxiety issues, I've become a recluse. I very rarely go out with other people and usually my husband is there too. I have very little self confidence left (not like I had much before) and generally avoid people. 

Well, I've taken some steps to fix all that and so far so good. Joining this chorus would get me out of my shell and I LOVE singing. I took voice lessons last year for about 3 months and improved rather quickly. I have a lot more confidence singing, but I'm still scared as heck to do it in front of others. I'm at a point where I miss singing so much that I don't care if other people hear me or not. Thankfully a chorus is about blending and harmonizing and I enjoyed it in high school so why not give it a try?

My favorite song to sing is...

Name that song and musical! 

I love it. I love singing Maureen's part but can also relate to Joanne's part as well. Maureen's attitude is a side of myself I buried when I said I do. I was a risk taker and I'd like to think flirty when I wanted to be. I've never been a party girl in any sense of the word and will never be, but I do like the limelight here and there. I never had this song as an assignment for voice lessons, but I have been working on it constantly. 

Singing is a good stress reliever. Almost as good as exercise...almost.  

New Doctor Who in 19 DAYS! 
New Game of Thrones in 20 DAYS!

My favorite Game of Thrones character? It's a tie between Arya Stark and Daenerys Targaryen. 
My husband and I both LOVE Arya and agree that if we have a child and it is a girl she will be named Arya.  I love Daenerys because life really screwed her over and she took control of it and is growing to be a very strong woman. The same could be said about Arya as well. And everyone in the book.  It is addicting and I'm working on the books now. Love it!

Winter is coming...

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I cried like a baby during this scene. One of those "Omg I didn't realize this show affected me like this" moments.

Mileage from 3/11: 1.8 running, .6 walking